Friday, April 08, 2005
Aprill 8 - Vick Hits Elliot With the Gift That Keeps On Giving
Which is greater: The amount of touchdowns Michael Vick has thrown for the Atlanta Falcons or the number of girls he has infected with Herpes Simplex II? As was first reported on The Smoking Gun, a 26 year old woman named Sonya Elliot is suing Vick for hitting her in the flat with a giant case of herpes. Vick may be erratic with his arm, but this suit confirms that he sure knows how to use his other gun. Perhaps the funniest part of the story is that Elliot alleges that Vick has used an alias – Ron Mexico – when being tested and treated for his rather embarrassing disease. Ron Mexico? What kind of name is that? Aside from a handful of guys named Israel (Steve Israel went to Pitt) and former Bronco Larry Canada, who the hell is named after a country? It just doesn’t sound right to hear something like - Mr. Mexico, could you please pee in this cup. Hell, if I were Vick, I would have gone with a pseudonym closer to home like Peerless Price or Arthur Blank (Falcon owner). Another peculiar part of this story is that Mexico met Elliot in May of 2001, but didn’t start banging her until the end of 2002. What the hell is wrong with this guy? The only guy in sports who is slower to close the deal is AC Green, and he doesn’t count because he has committed himself to a life of celibacy. Jesus, Vick is fast as lightening on the field but he sure doesn’t move too quickly in the bedroom.
April 8 - Bring Out The Gimp
[The Sportsaholic regrets to admit that he was recovering from a bender on Thursday and had to take the day off]
[also, for those who may not get the reference to the gimp - rent Pulp Fiction and compare it to the new Adidas add]
Folks, I am not a religious scholar but I think on Wednesday, we witnessed the fourth sign of the apocalypse. I can’t be sure, but I seem to recall an obscure part of the bible says the world will end when Yankee fans turn on one of their most beloved heroes. Well, that event happened this week so if the best-selling tabloid is correct, our days on this earth are numbered.
What we saw Wednesday in the Bronx was surreal and perhaps historic. I didn’t think I would live to see it, but we saw Yankee legend Mariano Rivera booed in front of the hometown folks at Yankee Stadium. That bears repeating. THE GIMP WAS BOOED AT YANKEE STADIUM! Are you kidding me? This is not Paul O’Neil. This is not Roger Clemens or Andy Petitte. This is Mary Rivera. This is the big guy. This is the cornerstone of the core. This is the difference-maker. This is the Godfather of Gimps for gods sake. But none of that mattered at 4: 21 EST in the Bronx Wednesday when a chorus of boos came cascading down on Mariano as he trudged off the mound, battered and bruised once again at the hands of the Red Sox. Fans sporting Boston lids probably contributed the lionshare of the chatter, but it was clear from the replay that many Yankee fans were willing accomplices.
So what is going on here? Clearly, the Sox have his number. I realize the 13th Amendment to the Constitution bans slavery and involuntary servitude, but the Sox own this guy. Pure and simple – Mary is the Sox bitch. The Yankees may be Pedro’s daddy, but the Sox are the dominatrix that leads Mary around the dungeon on a leash. Before you take issue with that comment, you may want to take a look at the recent history of this one-sided relationship. The Sox have gotten to him six times since last July and he has blown his last four save opportunities against his nemesis. Six is not a coincidence. Six is ownership. In fact, upon consideration, calling Mo a bitch may be a bit too generous.
The big question now is whether Mo’s problems will continue against the rest of the league. After all, he is 35 and relievers are prone to fall off cliffs, especially after they pass the five touchdown mark. And judging from what we saw this week, that cliff doesn’t seem too far off. Listen, I don’t expect Mo to become Bob Wickman or Uggy Urbina overnight. He probably still has enough in the tank to be a steady closer, but that is no longer a certainty. The fact is Mo is like Maverick in Top Gun. That accident in Game 4 of last year’s ALCS shook him up, much like Goose’s death threw Maverick for a loop. As a result of that mishap, Mo now lacks confidence and the willingness to engage. He may get his game back, much like Maverick did, but Yankee fans should be warned that real life does not always unfold like a Jerry Bruckheimer film. In real life, the MIG’s sometime shoot straight. Mariano found that out four times last year and twice again this week.
[also, for those who may not get the reference to the gimp - rent Pulp Fiction and compare it to the new Adidas add]
Folks, I am not a religious scholar but I think on Wednesday, we witnessed the fourth sign of the apocalypse. I can’t be sure, but I seem to recall an obscure part of the bible says the world will end when Yankee fans turn on one of their most beloved heroes. Well, that event happened this week so if the best-selling tabloid is correct, our days on this earth are numbered.
What we saw Wednesday in the Bronx was surreal and perhaps historic. I didn’t think I would live to see it, but we saw Yankee legend Mariano Rivera booed in front of the hometown folks at Yankee Stadium. That bears repeating. THE GIMP WAS BOOED AT YANKEE STADIUM! Are you kidding me? This is not Paul O’Neil. This is not Roger Clemens or Andy Petitte. This is Mary Rivera. This is the big guy. This is the cornerstone of the core. This is the difference-maker. This is the Godfather of Gimps for gods sake. But none of that mattered at 4: 21 EST in the Bronx Wednesday when a chorus of boos came cascading down on Mariano as he trudged off the mound, battered and bruised once again at the hands of the Red Sox. Fans sporting Boston lids probably contributed the lionshare of the chatter, but it was clear from the replay that many Yankee fans were willing accomplices.
So what is going on here? Clearly, the Sox have his number. I realize the 13th Amendment to the Constitution bans slavery and involuntary servitude, but the Sox own this guy. Pure and simple – Mary is the Sox bitch. The Yankees may be Pedro’s daddy, but the Sox are the dominatrix that leads Mary around the dungeon on a leash. Before you take issue with that comment, you may want to take a look at the recent history of this one-sided relationship. The Sox have gotten to him six times since last July and he has blown his last four save opportunities against his nemesis. Six is not a coincidence. Six is ownership. In fact, upon consideration, calling Mo a bitch may be a bit too generous.
The big question now is whether Mo’s problems will continue against the rest of the league. After all, he is 35 and relievers are prone to fall off cliffs, especially after they pass the five touchdown mark. And judging from what we saw this week, that cliff doesn’t seem too far off. Listen, I don’t expect Mo to become Bob Wickman or Uggy Urbina overnight. He probably still has enough in the tank to be a steady closer, but that is no longer a certainty. The fact is Mo is like Maverick in Top Gun. That accident in Game 4 of last year’s ALCS shook him up, much like Goose’s death threw Maverick for a loop. As a result of that mishap, Mo now lacks confidence and the willingness to engage. He may get his game back, much like Maverick did, but Yankee fans should be warned that real life does not always unfold like a Jerry Bruckheimer film. In real life, the MIG’s sometime shoot straight. Mariano found that out four times last year and twice again this week.
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
April 6 - "Welcome to Moving Day"
The 2005 College Basketball season is now in the can and that only means one thing: Its Masters week. And boy what a week it is shaping up to be down in the Georgia Pines. Look at all the subplots we have working. First, we have Phil Mickelson, coming off a win last week in Atlanta, trying to defend the green jacket he stole last year from Ernie Els with a historic bender on 18. There is the Big Easy trying to right things after a 2004 campaign that produced four top-10’s in the majors but no championship hardware. Then you have Vijay Singh, coming off a magnificent 2004, trying to win his second green jacket and place a stranglehold on the world’s number one ranking. Also, you have Tiger Woods trying to end a ten major drought and prove he is still the one to beat on Augusta’s torturous greens. If that isn’t enough, we have Reteif Goosen out to prove that he deserves mention as one of the game’s best and who is to say this cool customer won’t be rolling them pure come this weekend. Then we have the young guns – guys like Sergio and Chris Riley - gunning for their first major, desperately hoping that they won’t someday be mentioned as “the best golfer in the world who has never won a major.” The Masters is just great stuff and I will be glued to my television right up until Jim and Hootie present the green jacket at Butler Cabin on Sunday around 6:50 EST. And as in year’s past, there is only one thing you can be sure of this year and that is when CBS picks up coverage around 3:30 on Saturday, Jim will open up with his signature: “WELCOME TO MOVING DAY AT AUGUSTA.” I get chills just thinking about it.
So who do I like this year? Well, it is always a crap shoot picking a golfer out of a field like this, but I am going to take Goose. Yep, the Goose is loose down in Georgia and I say he picks up his third major and first green jacket. Why the Goose? Well, there is simply not a cooler customer out there than South Africa’s favorite slinger. Tiger can intimidate and be lights out, but for my money, the Goose is the guy I want holding the putter with the tourney on the line. Based on what I saw from Goose at Shinecock last year, this is my guy. He is Fast Eddie Felson, Annie Duke and Adam Vinaterri all rolled into one. That is how clutch he was during Sunday of last year’s open. Reteif started the year slowly, but he has an 8th at Doral, a 4th at Bay Hill and a 12th at The Players since the tour headed east. My only concern with Goosen is he hasn’t played that well in his six appearances at Augusta. He has some top-25s, but he only has a single top-3 and that was in 2002 when he crapped the bed with a 74 on Sunday and finished three back of Mr. Woods. Perhaps he learned from that and come Sunday, he sticks it back in Woods face. That is something I would love to see.
So Goose is my guy this year, but I would be remiss if I didn’t throw out some other bones. Hell, I wouldn’t mind seeing Phil repeat and it is not out of the question. Phyllis Diller comes into the tourney as the tour’s leading money winner and there is no question he has the game to win this week. I also think the time may be right for Sergio. He has been fairly close a couple times and perhaps this is the year he gets it done. He certainly has the game to get it done. Other foreigners I like for the office pool include Darren Clarke and Stu Appleby even though neither has really done much Augusta over the years. As for the Americans – what about Tom Lemon? He has been playing very good gold since Labor Day and I wouldn’t be surprised to see him with a top 10. He is a great value pick in the office pool. If you are looking for karma – what about Davis Love? His Heels won the NCAAs on Monday night and Davis could make two in one week for the boys back in Chapel Hill. Another good value pick is Chris Riley. I know he is young, but he is a great putter and that is what the Masters is all about. Lastly, I will throw a plug to the old man on tour – Jay Haas. Augusta’s greens are probably too much for Haas nerves, but nevertheless, he must love playing the Masters. Why is that? Well, he is paired on Thursday with Jack, meaning this is the only tourney he plays where golfers, other then himself, can remember where they were when Alan Shepherd orbited the Earth.
Do you want to know how long it has been since Tiger last won a major? Well, it was so long ago that Worldcom was operational, the White House still claimed Saddam Hussein had big old 30 megaton warheads, Serena still cared about playing Tennis, Chick Hearn was still calling games for the Lakers, and Sox fans were still living under an 84 year old curse. That is a long, long time ago. In that time, Tiger has played in ten majors and has only been in the top-10 three times. These top-10’s occurred at the 2002 PGA (2nd to Jim Beem), the 2003 British (4th behind some dude named Curtis) and the 2004 British (t-9th behind Tad Hamilton). In the grand scheme of things, this is not the end of the world, but we are talking about Tiger here. And in case you care, Jack never had this kind of slump. In fact, if you look at Jack’s major slump in the 70s, it doesn’t even come close to comparing with what Tiger is going through. You want evidence? Jack had a ten major slump beginning with the 1976 Masters that went through the 1978 British. During that time, his worst finish was 11th and he had six top-5s. That is a run and not a slump if you ask me. Moreover, if Tiger goes winless in the majors this year, he will have fallen behind Jack’s pace. The moral to this story is Tiger has to stop playing xbox with Elin and get back to work. The clock just began ticking on the big cat’s run to immortality.
Welcome back Smoltzie - we missed you! Did anyone catch John Smoltz and his much hyped return to the Braves starting rotation yesterday? It wasn’t pretty and that is being pretty damn generous. For those of you who did miss the Braves season opener. Smoltz gave up six earned runs while recording five outs. He faced 13 hitters and threw 65 pitches before manager Bobby Cox had seen enough and lifted him for Jorge Sosa. I know its early and only baseball phonies reach for the panic button on opening day, but Braves fans better hope they didn’t see the real John Smoltz yesterday. After all, the Braves made Smoltzie’s return to the starting rotation a cornerstone of their off-season and this experiment must succeed if they are going to compete for the NL East crown. Granted, yesterday was just one start, but you must realize that there is no guarantee this media darling can come back and be a dominant starter. To suggest otherwise is a bit foolish since he is trying to do something that has never been done with any real success. As such, there is some risk here. In fact, there is huge risk because number 29 is being counted on give the Braves 200 plus innings and 17-18 wins. Based on yesterday’s sterling outing, Smoltz will need to make 130 starts to get to that 200 inning mark.
I didn’t think it was possible, but I found a crew of announcers that is harder to absorb than those magnificent crews in New York and Atlanta. I was surfing the baseball package the other day and settled on a pitching dual between Cleveland and the White Sox. Ken Harrelson and Darren Jackson announce ChiSox games and let me tell you – this pairing is an abortion that survived. With this being my first palehose game, I am not sure which guy was which, but on countless occasions, this duo was flat out cheering for the home club. At one point, there was a comment that the "good guys" led 1-0, and on another occasion, one of the guys was begging for a long ball to “STAY FAIR!” It seems both cruel and unusual to plug South Siders with both a losing team and a laughable broadcasting crew.
Speaking of bad broadcasters, the Yankee TV crew was in rare form this week as the Sox came to town. This is a special occasion and that means Paulie O’Neil was flown in from Ohio to offer his two jaded and worthless cents. O’Neil was a nice ball player but he is nothing short of a pinstripe propagandist in the booth. He is a modern day Joe Goebbles, who in case you forgot, was the spokesman for the twentieth century’s other evil empire. O’Neil just cannot help himself from praising his old Yankee mates and apologizing for any and all of their mistakes. When Mariano Rivera blew a save yesterday, O’Neil nearly choked as he was coughing up excuses for the gimp. Paulie basically calls a game much like a thirteen year adoring kid would call a game. His comments are so laden with adulation that you might think the comments were coming from an autograph seeker and not a former player. Not only that, but he cannot compliment a single player in baseball without parsing it with some sort of deference for a Yankee. Case in point, Paulie could never talk up Miguel Tejada too aggressively since that could be construed to mean there is a MLB shortstop that may be better than Mr. Jeter. It is bad enough that we have to stomach Mike Kay’s senseless banter and thinly veiled barbs for 130-140 games a year, but O’Neil is just too much for my stomach lining to absorb. I guess if could be worse though. If Steinbrenner really wanted to kill me he would bring that other right-fielder into the booth. You know the guy – he wore number forty four.
This comes to us straight from the selective amnesia file. North Carolina Senior Forward Jackie Manuel was quoted in USA TODAY yesterday talking about UNC’s miserable 2003 campaign that ended with a loss in the NIT. “It was miserable. It was a long season. It was a frustrating season. It was something I really didn’t expect. The year before (we) went to the Sweet Sixteen so I thought we were going to pick up where they left off.” Say what Jack? Mr. Manuel sure needs a history lesson because his facts are a bit off. In case anyone forgot, UNC went 8-20 in 2002, which is the year that Manuel refers to above. Okay, I am not going to jump on Jack because it appears that the reporter who wrote the story placed his quote in the wrong context. I will give Jack some latitude and assume he was really talking about UNC’s success in 2001, which is the year before he arrived in Chapel Hill. Okay, given that concession, Manuel is still off because the 2001 Tar Heels never sniffed the Sweet Sixteen. That team got knocked off by Penn State in the second round. Manuel is obviously no historian, but the real fault here lies with USA Today reporter Malcolm Moran. Rather than embarrass Manuel, Moran should have left the quote out or double-backed and asked Manuel to clarify his statement. He did neither and that makes him a lazy journalist or a prick – or perhaps both!
Did anyone notice that this year’s inductees to the Basketball Hall of Fame were announced this week and Dominique Wilkins and Joe Dumars were left out while two ass clown coaches got the invite? What the hell is going on here? To leave Dominique out of the Hall while handing out a ticket to Jim Boeheim is tantamount to leaving Pol Pot off history’s “great villain” list yet giving the nod to Henry Kissinger. Heck, both were pretty villainous, but one was clearly a monster while the other was merely an unintelligible jerkoff. The same goes with basketball. How can Wilkins not be in the Hall? The guy is ninth on the NBA’s all-time scoring list with almost 27,000 points. He was a nine-time all-star who was the mainstay of a pretty decent Hawks team that made the playoffs in eight of Wilkins first eleven seasons. The Human Highlight averaged thirty points on a few occasions and there was nobody in the game who could stop this guy in the open court. Now some may say that Wilkins was a scorer who played in a high octane era and therefore his numbers should be looked upon with a jaundiced eye. I disagree strongly. I saw this guy play and he dominated, certainly more so than Alex English - who is already sitting in Springfield. I understand that some may want to keep the bar for Hall entry high, but this is a gross oversight, made more glaring by the fact that two college coaches, Jim Boeheim and Jim Calhoun, were voted in this year. Since when did coaches become more important than the players they coach? Both of these men have had great careers, highlighted by 700 college wins apiece, but do they deserve to be immortalized? Boeheim has won one NCAA tournament in 59 years of coaching and Calhoun has been to exactly two Final Fours. And as far as Boeheim is concerned, is that 700 win total all that impressive when it contains eight home victories a year over teams like St. Bonaventure, Cornell, Marist and some Brooklyn night school that teaches English to recent immigrants? As far as I am concerned, at least 200 hundred of Boeheim’s 700 wins don’t count since they came against patsies that even the BCS doesn’t recognize. I understand that Basketball writers may want to keep the Hall a sacred place reserved for only the best of the best, but this is ridiculous. Wilkins was the best unless you use the most restrictive definition possible. And under such a definition, Boeheim’s induction is a travesty.
I have a second big criticism with Basketball’s Hall of Fame and it stems from the lack of respect the museum shows for the college game, and great college players in particular. Unlike football, there is only one Basketball Hall of Fame to honor college and professional athletes. Football has it right since they have a museum that honors those who were great as collegians but less than immortal at the professional level. Basketball and Baseball have no such option. Instead, basketball has a single repository where the greats of the game are honored. But here is the catch – in recent times, the basketball hall of fame has never honored a PLAYER solely for his contributions as a collegian. This is odd since there are a handful of coaches who have been honored even though they have never spent a day walking the sidelines of the NBA. So what gives here? We honor guys for coaching college basketball yet we don’t have a single minute for those guys who played college basketball? Now some might argue that I am off base here since many inductees were great as both college and professional players. That is true, but over the last 25 years, not a single guy has been inducted solely based on his college resume. If this were not the case, David Thompson, Ralph Sampson, Christian Laettner and Wayman Tisdale would all be enshrined. To make matters worse, a few women – Ann Meyers and Denise Curry – have been inducted based entirely on careers played at UCLA. If this isn’t a double standard, I don’t know what is. It is time for the Basketball Hall of Fame to do one of two things. Preferably, they should open up another wing to honor college basketball’s elite players and coaches. The second option is for the Hall to start throwing out all these college coaches. Such an option would mirror what goes on in baseball. Hell, you don’t see college coaches like Rod Dedeaux, Cliff Gustafson and Mike Marquess with plaques in Cooperstown. As such, what are guys like John Cheney, Jim Boeheim and Jim Calhoun doing in Springfield? It is time for the Basketball Hall of Fame to decide whether to recognize the college game or not. If it’s the former, it is time to start sending out the invites because there are plenty of great collegians that deserve recognition. But it it’s the latter; the Hall’s custodian should break out his industrial strength broom because a lot of crap needs to be swept out the door.
So who do I like this year? Well, it is always a crap shoot picking a golfer out of a field like this, but I am going to take Goose. Yep, the Goose is loose down in Georgia and I say he picks up his third major and first green jacket. Why the Goose? Well, there is simply not a cooler customer out there than South Africa’s favorite slinger. Tiger can intimidate and be lights out, but for my money, the Goose is the guy I want holding the putter with the tourney on the line. Based on what I saw from Goose at Shinecock last year, this is my guy. He is Fast Eddie Felson, Annie Duke and Adam Vinaterri all rolled into one. That is how clutch he was during Sunday of last year’s open. Reteif started the year slowly, but he has an 8th at Doral, a 4th at Bay Hill and a 12th at The Players since the tour headed east. My only concern with Goosen is he hasn’t played that well in his six appearances at Augusta. He has some top-25s, but he only has a single top-3 and that was in 2002 when he crapped the bed with a 74 on Sunday and finished three back of Mr. Woods. Perhaps he learned from that and come Sunday, he sticks it back in Woods face. That is something I would love to see.
So Goose is my guy this year, but I would be remiss if I didn’t throw out some other bones. Hell, I wouldn’t mind seeing Phil repeat and it is not out of the question. Phyllis Diller comes into the tourney as the tour’s leading money winner and there is no question he has the game to win this week. I also think the time may be right for Sergio. He has been fairly close a couple times and perhaps this is the year he gets it done. He certainly has the game to get it done. Other foreigners I like for the office pool include Darren Clarke and Stu Appleby even though neither has really done much Augusta over the years. As for the Americans – what about Tom Lemon? He has been playing very good gold since Labor Day and I wouldn’t be surprised to see him with a top 10. He is a great value pick in the office pool. If you are looking for karma – what about Davis Love? His Heels won the NCAAs on Monday night and Davis could make two in one week for the boys back in Chapel Hill. Another good value pick is Chris Riley. I know he is young, but he is a great putter and that is what the Masters is all about. Lastly, I will throw a plug to the old man on tour – Jay Haas. Augusta’s greens are probably too much for Haas nerves, but nevertheless, he must love playing the Masters. Why is that? Well, he is paired on Thursday with Jack, meaning this is the only tourney he plays where golfers, other then himself, can remember where they were when Alan Shepherd orbited the Earth.
Do you want to know how long it has been since Tiger last won a major? Well, it was so long ago that Worldcom was operational, the White House still claimed Saddam Hussein had big old 30 megaton warheads, Serena still cared about playing Tennis, Chick Hearn was still calling games for the Lakers, and Sox fans were still living under an 84 year old curse. That is a long, long time ago. In that time, Tiger has played in ten majors and has only been in the top-10 three times. These top-10’s occurred at the 2002 PGA (2nd to Jim Beem), the 2003 British (4th behind some dude named Curtis) and the 2004 British (t-9th behind Tad Hamilton). In the grand scheme of things, this is not the end of the world, but we are talking about Tiger here. And in case you care, Jack never had this kind of slump. In fact, if you look at Jack’s major slump in the 70s, it doesn’t even come close to comparing with what Tiger is going through. You want evidence? Jack had a ten major slump beginning with the 1976 Masters that went through the 1978 British. During that time, his worst finish was 11th and he had six top-5s. That is a run and not a slump if you ask me. Moreover, if Tiger goes winless in the majors this year, he will have fallen behind Jack’s pace. The moral to this story is Tiger has to stop playing xbox with Elin and get back to work. The clock just began ticking on the big cat’s run to immortality.
Welcome back Smoltzie - we missed you! Did anyone catch John Smoltz and his much hyped return to the Braves starting rotation yesterday? It wasn’t pretty and that is being pretty damn generous. For those of you who did miss the Braves season opener. Smoltz gave up six earned runs while recording five outs. He faced 13 hitters and threw 65 pitches before manager Bobby Cox had seen enough and lifted him for Jorge Sosa. I know its early and only baseball phonies reach for the panic button on opening day, but Braves fans better hope they didn’t see the real John Smoltz yesterday. After all, the Braves made Smoltzie’s return to the starting rotation a cornerstone of their off-season and this experiment must succeed if they are going to compete for the NL East crown. Granted, yesterday was just one start, but you must realize that there is no guarantee this media darling can come back and be a dominant starter. To suggest otherwise is a bit foolish since he is trying to do something that has never been done with any real success. As such, there is some risk here. In fact, there is huge risk because number 29 is being counted on give the Braves 200 plus innings and 17-18 wins. Based on yesterday’s sterling outing, Smoltz will need to make 130 starts to get to that 200 inning mark.
I didn’t think it was possible, but I found a crew of announcers that is harder to absorb than those magnificent crews in New York and Atlanta. I was surfing the baseball package the other day and settled on a pitching dual between Cleveland and the White Sox. Ken Harrelson and Darren Jackson announce ChiSox games and let me tell you – this pairing is an abortion that survived. With this being my first palehose game, I am not sure which guy was which, but on countless occasions, this duo was flat out cheering for the home club. At one point, there was a comment that the "good guys" led 1-0, and on another occasion, one of the guys was begging for a long ball to “STAY FAIR!” It seems both cruel and unusual to plug South Siders with both a losing team and a laughable broadcasting crew.
Speaking of bad broadcasters, the Yankee TV crew was in rare form this week as the Sox came to town. This is a special occasion and that means Paulie O’Neil was flown in from Ohio to offer his two jaded and worthless cents. O’Neil was a nice ball player but he is nothing short of a pinstripe propagandist in the booth. He is a modern day Joe Goebbles, who in case you forgot, was the spokesman for the twentieth century’s other evil empire. O’Neil just cannot help himself from praising his old Yankee mates and apologizing for any and all of their mistakes. When Mariano Rivera blew a save yesterday, O’Neil nearly choked as he was coughing up excuses for the gimp. Paulie basically calls a game much like a thirteen year adoring kid would call a game. His comments are so laden with adulation that you might think the comments were coming from an autograph seeker and not a former player. Not only that, but he cannot compliment a single player in baseball without parsing it with some sort of deference for a Yankee. Case in point, Paulie could never talk up Miguel Tejada too aggressively since that could be construed to mean there is a MLB shortstop that may be better than Mr. Jeter. It is bad enough that we have to stomach Mike Kay’s senseless banter and thinly veiled barbs for 130-140 games a year, but O’Neil is just too much for my stomach lining to absorb. I guess if could be worse though. If Steinbrenner really wanted to kill me he would bring that other right-fielder into the booth. You know the guy – he wore number forty four.
This comes to us straight from the selective amnesia file. North Carolina Senior Forward Jackie Manuel was quoted in USA TODAY yesterday talking about UNC’s miserable 2003 campaign that ended with a loss in the NIT. “It was miserable. It was a long season. It was a frustrating season. It was something I really didn’t expect. The year before (we) went to the Sweet Sixteen so I thought we were going to pick up where they left off.” Say what Jack? Mr. Manuel sure needs a history lesson because his facts are a bit off. In case anyone forgot, UNC went 8-20 in 2002, which is the year that Manuel refers to above. Okay, I am not going to jump on Jack because it appears that the reporter who wrote the story placed his quote in the wrong context. I will give Jack some latitude and assume he was really talking about UNC’s success in 2001, which is the year before he arrived in Chapel Hill. Okay, given that concession, Manuel is still off because the 2001 Tar Heels never sniffed the Sweet Sixteen. That team got knocked off by Penn State in the second round. Manuel is obviously no historian, but the real fault here lies with USA Today reporter Malcolm Moran. Rather than embarrass Manuel, Moran should have left the quote out or double-backed and asked Manuel to clarify his statement. He did neither and that makes him a lazy journalist or a prick – or perhaps both!
Did anyone notice that this year’s inductees to the Basketball Hall of Fame were announced this week and Dominique Wilkins and Joe Dumars were left out while two ass clown coaches got the invite? What the hell is going on here? To leave Dominique out of the Hall while handing out a ticket to Jim Boeheim is tantamount to leaving Pol Pot off history’s “great villain” list yet giving the nod to Henry Kissinger. Heck, both were pretty villainous, but one was clearly a monster while the other was merely an unintelligible jerkoff. The same goes with basketball. How can Wilkins not be in the Hall? The guy is ninth on the NBA’s all-time scoring list with almost 27,000 points. He was a nine-time all-star who was the mainstay of a pretty decent Hawks team that made the playoffs in eight of Wilkins first eleven seasons. The Human Highlight averaged thirty points on a few occasions and there was nobody in the game who could stop this guy in the open court. Now some may say that Wilkins was a scorer who played in a high octane era and therefore his numbers should be looked upon with a jaundiced eye. I disagree strongly. I saw this guy play and he dominated, certainly more so than Alex English - who is already sitting in Springfield. I understand that some may want to keep the bar for Hall entry high, but this is a gross oversight, made more glaring by the fact that two college coaches, Jim Boeheim and Jim Calhoun, were voted in this year. Since when did coaches become more important than the players they coach? Both of these men have had great careers, highlighted by 700 college wins apiece, but do they deserve to be immortalized? Boeheim has won one NCAA tournament in 59 years of coaching and Calhoun has been to exactly two Final Fours. And as far as Boeheim is concerned, is that 700 win total all that impressive when it contains eight home victories a year over teams like St. Bonaventure, Cornell, Marist and some Brooklyn night school that teaches English to recent immigrants? As far as I am concerned, at least 200 hundred of Boeheim’s 700 wins don’t count since they came against patsies that even the BCS doesn’t recognize. I understand that Basketball writers may want to keep the Hall a sacred place reserved for only the best of the best, but this is ridiculous. Wilkins was the best unless you use the most restrictive definition possible. And under such a definition, Boeheim’s induction is a travesty.
I have a second big criticism with Basketball’s Hall of Fame and it stems from the lack of respect the museum shows for the college game, and great college players in particular. Unlike football, there is only one Basketball Hall of Fame to honor college and professional athletes. Football has it right since they have a museum that honors those who were great as collegians but less than immortal at the professional level. Basketball and Baseball have no such option. Instead, basketball has a single repository where the greats of the game are honored. But here is the catch – in recent times, the basketball hall of fame has never honored a PLAYER solely for his contributions as a collegian. This is odd since there are a handful of coaches who have been honored even though they have never spent a day walking the sidelines of the NBA. So what gives here? We honor guys for coaching college basketball yet we don’t have a single minute for those guys who played college basketball? Now some might argue that I am off base here since many inductees were great as both college and professional players. That is true, but over the last 25 years, not a single guy has been inducted solely based on his college resume. If this were not the case, David Thompson, Ralph Sampson, Christian Laettner and Wayman Tisdale would all be enshrined. To make matters worse, a few women – Ann Meyers and Denise Curry – have been inducted based entirely on careers played at UCLA. If this isn’t a double standard, I don’t know what is. It is time for the Basketball Hall of Fame to do one of two things. Preferably, they should open up another wing to honor college basketball’s elite players and coaches. The second option is for the Hall to start throwing out all these college coaches. Such an option would mirror what goes on in baseball. Hell, you don’t see college coaches like Rod Dedeaux, Cliff Gustafson and Mike Marquess with plaques in Cooperstown. As such, what are guys like John Cheney, Jim Boeheim and Jim Calhoun doing in Springfield? It is time for the Basketball Hall of Fame to decide whether to recognize the college game or not. If it’s the former, it is time to start sending out the invites because there are plenty of great collegians that deserve recognition. But it it’s the latter; the Hall’s custodian should break out his industrial strength broom because a lot of crap needs to be swept out the door.
Tuesday, April 05, 2005
April 5 - Nothing Could Be Finer . . . .
There are more names and numbers hanging from the rafters of the Smith Center then I can count on six hands, but to this old fan, four deserve special recognition. If I were curator of that jersey garden, I would carve out a special section next year and in that section would be the names of Lennie Rosenbluth, James Worthy, Donald Williams and Sean May. Why should these four be singled out? Well, it is really quite simple. Unlike dozens of other UNC all-Americans that played before, during and after - these four were able to carry their teams when it mattered most. Guys like Charlie Scott, Larry Miller, Phil Ford, Walter Davis, Mike O’Koren, Al Wood, Kenny Smith,, Rasheed Wallace, Jerry Stackhouse, Vince Carter and Antawn Jamison were all great players, but none was able to shoulder the load and carry his team to a championship. Now I am not going to sit here and argue that the four aforementioned players didn’t have help, and plenty of it. But I will argue that the contributions of these four Final Four Most Valuable Players made the difference in UNC’s title runs. Rosenbluth was clearly the key in 1957 and there is no way Carolina wins championships in 82 and 93 without Worthy’s jams and Donnie’s threes. Moreover, there was no way Carolina was winning number four last night without Chapel Hill’s favorite doughboy. With that said, I feel this group deserves special recognition high above the floor of the Smith Center. I realize Deano would never sign off on such an overt display of individualism, but its time for UNC to honor its true heroes.
Well, it wasn’t easy, but sixty year old UNC fans got their fourth ring last night, courtesy of Mr. May and my favorite whipping boy, Raymond Felton. To say Sean May was unstoppable last night is a gross understatement and along the lines of saying something like Tony Montana liked his blow. May, doing his best of impression of Bill Walton, was great from the get go, scoring UNC’s first deuce one minute into the game. Whether Illinois stuck him with James Augustine, Roger Powell or a double team, May delivered. He made great decisions all night and he made Illinois pay when they attempted to bring weak-side help. He finished with 26 on 10/11 shooting. That isn’t quite the 21 of 22 Walton had in 1973, but its right up there in Championship game lore. But May wasn’t alone. He got a lot of help last night from Ray Felton who saved his best for the last game of the season. Ray played under control all night long and only turned the ball over twice. Although saddled with some early foul trouble, Felton remained aggressive on offense and his three with five minutes to go was huge for the Heels. UNC was under siege at the time and Felton’s bomb gave the team some needed oxygen.
As I said yesterday, UNC had to do three things to win. They needed at least 20 from May, which they got. They needed Felton to keep to his turnovers to four our less and he only coughed up two. And they needed to keep Illinois to less than 35 percent from three. That they got (30 Percent on 12/40), but if Illinois made a single extra three and bumped against that 35 percent target, the game’s outcome may have been different. Illinois couldn’t hit a whole lot in the first half, but the Illini zeroed in early in the second half and for ten minutes, it felt as if they couldn’t miss. They finally cooled off but that didn’t stop them from getting a few late opportunities to win the game. In fact, had Luther Head connected on a three with 20 seconds to go, the game would have been tied and UNC would have needed a Michael Jordan moment to win the game in regulation. Luckily for Carolina fans and bettors who had the under, such drama was not needed.
So what is the fallout from this game? Well, most importantly, Roy Williams is now off the hook. Had he lost last night, Williams would have been carrying around a stigma for the next year that is as heavy as anyone in coaching today, all sports included. We are talking Schottenheimer and Dusty stuff here. But UNC, with all that talent, found a way get Williams the ring he has been chasing since he first showed up at the 1991 Final Four. I am still no fan of Williams, but he earned some equity last night. He still isn’t up there with K and Izzo, but he now fits right in there with Skin Flute and Boeheim. With that said, Eddie Sutton probably assumes the title of best coach in college basketball who has not won a title.
Well, it wasn’t easy, but sixty year old UNC fans got their fourth ring last night, courtesy of Mr. May and my favorite whipping boy, Raymond Felton. To say Sean May was unstoppable last night is a gross understatement and along the lines of saying something like Tony Montana liked his blow. May, doing his best of impression of Bill Walton, was great from the get go, scoring UNC’s first deuce one minute into the game. Whether Illinois stuck him with James Augustine, Roger Powell or a double team, May delivered. He made great decisions all night and he made Illinois pay when they attempted to bring weak-side help. He finished with 26 on 10/11 shooting. That isn’t quite the 21 of 22 Walton had in 1973, but its right up there in Championship game lore. But May wasn’t alone. He got a lot of help last night from Ray Felton who saved his best for the last game of the season. Ray played under control all night long and only turned the ball over twice. Although saddled with some early foul trouble, Felton remained aggressive on offense and his three with five minutes to go was huge for the Heels. UNC was under siege at the time and Felton’s bomb gave the team some needed oxygen.
As I said yesterday, UNC had to do three things to win. They needed at least 20 from May, which they got. They needed Felton to keep to his turnovers to four our less and he only coughed up two. And they needed to keep Illinois to less than 35 percent from three. That they got (30 Percent on 12/40), but if Illinois made a single extra three and bumped against that 35 percent target, the game’s outcome may have been different. Illinois couldn’t hit a whole lot in the first half, but the Illini zeroed in early in the second half and for ten minutes, it felt as if they couldn’t miss. They finally cooled off but that didn’t stop them from getting a few late opportunities to win the game. In fact, had Luther Head connected on a three with 20 seconds to go, the game would have been tied and UNC would have needed a Michael Jordan moment to win the game in regulation. Luckily for Carolina fans and bettors who had the under, such drama was not needed.
So what is the fallout from this game? Well, most importantly, Roy Williams is now off the hook. Had he lost last night, Williams would have been carrying around a stigma for the next year that is as heavy as anyone in coaching today, all sports included. We are talking Schottenheimer and Dusty stuff here. But UNC, with all that talent, found a way get Williams the ring he has been chasing since he first showed up at the 1991 Final Four. I am still no fan of Williams, but he earned some equity last night. He still isn’t up there with K and Izzo, but he now fits right in there with Skin Flute and Boeheim. With that said, Eddie Sutton probably assumes the title of best coach in college basketball who has not won a title.
Monday, April 04, 2005
April 4 - 1957, 1982, 1993 and 2005
What do the Final Fours of 1957, 1982, 1993 and 2005 all have in common? Well, first of all, they were all played in states that touch the Mississippi River (Missouri and Louisiana). Secondly, following tonight’s game, each will have been won by the University of North Carolina – my pick to win to the 2005 National Championship. I don’t make this pick with a ton of confidence, but I feel North Carolina crossed an important bridge on Saturday evening and they appear to have just enough juice to get over the finish line.
Let’s be honest here, Saturday night was not pretty for UNC, particularly in the first half. They were outhustled and outplayed by Michigan State and I felt they were lucky to be only down five at the twenty minute mark. It was North Carolina at is worst – Ray Felton was as wild as St. Louis Cardinal pitcher Rick Ankiel was during the 2000 NLCS, and the Heels were simply getting manhandled on the defensive glass. MSU was just throwing crap at the rim and successfully chasing it down with only token resistance. A few offensive rebounds are understandable, but when the number swelled to double digits, I was longing for the days of George Lynch. Fortunately, at halftime, Coach Roy Williams was able to regroup and the Heels came out and played a terrific second half. Felton stopped handing the ball over to MSU and the Spartans were treated to a massive helping of Sean May. I mentioned in my preview that I thought these two were the keys to the game, and in the second half, I was proven right. In the second half, Felton only had one turnover, made several key shots and got May the ball down deep where the 260 pound badass could cause havoc. MSU center Paul Davis gave a game effort, but he was no match for May who ended up with 18 second half points. Meanwhile, MSU, always a bit erratic when it comes to perimeter shooting, simply lacked enough firepower to stay with UNC in the second frame. The Spartan cause sure wasn’t helped by the fact that Alan Anderson went scoreless and senior Chris Hill was firing blanks. Shannon Brown took up some of this scoring load early, but when his gun cooled, the Spartans were cooked.
So now Carolina moves on to face Illinois in a matchup of the nation’s top two seeded teams. The Illini got a scare on Saturday night as they only led by one with ten minutes to go, but Luther Head rode to the rescue with three big bombs that slingshot Illinois to a lead that it would never relinquish. Head’s air assault followed a ten minute power sermon by Roger “The Minister” Powell that resulted in 14 unexpected points for Bruce Webber’s crew. However, despite Powell’s performance, Pitino’s Cardinals were right there with ten to go. And surprisingly, they were there without any contribution from Francisco Garcia. This could not have been anticipated, especially since Garcia was being defended by a much smaller player in Deron Williams. On paper, this should have been all Louisville, but Garcia looked unsure of himself all night and on many occasions, he forced shots that had no prayer of being answered. Yet, Coach Rick Pitino kept calling his number even though it eventually became clear that Louisville’s best matchup was Ellis Miles against anyone on the Illini’s roster. Miles was truly a force yesterday, yet Louisville didn’t do nearly enough to exploit his power. Further, I felt Louisville was much too passive on defense, rarely coming out of their zone and never pressing when Illinois had its entire backcourt triumvirate in the game. Perhaps Pitino felt his guys were just not quick enough to handle Illinois off the dribble, but at some point, he had to get some more pressure on the perimeter.
So why am I going with Carolina? It’s really pretty simple. Coach Williams has a weapon that Illinois simply cannot stop and that is Sean May. If Ellis Miles can unload on Illinois, just imagine what May will do come tip-off. If I am Coach Williams, I open up this giant can of whupass at 9:21 EST and shove it down Illinois’s throat for the next two hours. I am not saying the Carolina doughboy is going to have the same kind of 21/22 championship night that Bill Walton had in St. Louis back in 1973, but if I had to guess, I would say May is good for a 24 point and 14 rebound game on his way to the Final Four MVP. With May as their cornerstone, I think Carolina will have their way on offense so long as Felton can keep things tight. The Heels sometimes struggle with shot blockers, but that is of no concern against Illinois’s vertically challenged big guys. Further, Felton and McCants should have no trouble taking Dee Brown and Luther Head off the dribble. With that said, Carolina will get its points and the only question that remains is whether Illinois will get more. Hell, if the Illini pour in 15 three’s, all bets are off, but so long as Carolina can get some pressure out on the perimeter, I think they will be in decent shape. There are the key numbers I am looking at. Carolina needs May to rack up at least 20, Felton to keep his turnovers to four or less, and keep Illinois to less than 35 percent from three. So long as these metrics are hit, Carolina will leave St. Louis with its fourth national basketball championship in school history.
Ever since CBS got the rights to the NCAA tournament in 1982, Billy Packer has been the color commentator for the national championship game. Lest you forget, Packer came over to CBS from NBC where he used to work alongside Al McGuire in a three-man booth. I have always been a fan of Packer’s, even in those early days when he had to work with disgraces like McGuire and Brent. Unlike most in the business, Billy calls it like he sees it. He is an old-school analyst who is willing to offer an opinion even if it paints a player or coach in an unfavorable light. Moreover, Packer’s knowledge of history is deep and he has a great feel for identifying the subtle nuances that end up deciding games. Despite such qualities, I think I am in the minority as far as Packer goes. In recent weeks, I have heard many fans and pundits criticize Billy P and the cyberworld is filled with complaints aimed at the bald demon deacon. (http://underscorebleach.net/content/jotsheet/2005/03/billy_packer). If I had to synthesize these complaints into a single cohesive thesis, I would say basketball fans dislike Packer because he much too negative. I have heard other complaints as well, but the outstanding issue for most is Packer’s obsession with calling a glass half empty. What the hell is wrong with these people? Guys, Packer is an “analyst.” He is paid to analyze and offer critiques, even when such critiques are not flattering to a coach or a player or a program. In my estimation, there is nothing worse than an analyst who cannot step up and offer well-earned criticism. After all, every time someone takes a player off the dribble, a defender was taken off the dribble. In this case, both the success and the failure deserve attention. If you are going to bombard me all night with comments on how Sean May is unstoppable, than I think it is probably worth mentioning who May is abusing each time he touches the ball. And when coaches mess up, like Tubby Smith did against Michigan State, I want those mistakes highlighted and brought to the masses. Packer did as much when he faulted Smith for playing Timmy Lupus and Rudy Stein in the second overtime of last week’s regional final in Austin. But to hear his critics tell it, Packer was just harping on the negative to rip a coach he doesn’t like. We have enough glorification in sports and the reason for that is the networks, which pay astronomical rights fees, are unwilling to hire analysts who disparage the product. I wouldn’t say Packer unfairly disparages anything, but at least he is willing to offer an opinion that isn’t supplied to him by his producers. We need more of this in sports, not less of it. Good analysts must have a healthy degree of skepticism. Those who lack this trait should try out for cheerleader or perhaps writing equity research for a big Wall Street investment bank. I will be the first to admit Packer isn’t perfect, but I’ll take his frankness any day of the week over those whose purpose is to protect the product at all costs.
Could someone please explain to me what this love affair the guys at ESPN have with the Minnesota Twins? In case you didn’t notice, four of ESPN’s top six baseball writers (Jayson Stark, Buster Olney, Peter Gammons and Jerry Krasnick) have picked the Twins to win the 2005 World Series. It seems that every year, and in every sport, there is a trendy underdog pick and this year it is obviously the Twinkies. I realize it is a bit conservative and boring to pick the Yankees or the Red Sox or the Marlins, but what is this fascination with the Teflon Twins? What have these guys done to deserve such adulation? Hey, I will concede the Twins are a very well run organization that keeps plugging away with a great farm system and a $55-60 million dollar payroll. This is a club that is constantly able to reload from within and always acts dispassionately when tough organizational decisions have to be made. While such aptitude is to be commended, it doesn’t automatically make this club a serious contender for the World Championship. I recognize they have a stud at the head of their staff in Johan Santana, but do Brad Radke and Carlos Silva strike fear into opposing lineups? There are some great arms in the bullpen, which is shocking for a low budget club, but is Joe Nathan the guy you want out there closing games in October? He was passable against the Yanks last year in the ALDS, but those five walks in five innings don’t exactly inspire confidence. Everyone seems to love catcher Joe Mauer, but so what if he hits .300 with 25 bombs this year? Those are more Varitek-like than Pudge-like numbers. True, they will have super-soph Justin Morneau for the entire year this season, and he could be a monster, but he better be another Harmon Killibrew because there isn’t a whole lot of power coming from the corner outfielders. Getting rid of Koskie’s whiffs at third was probably a positive, but Mike Cuddyer isn’t exactly Gary Gaetti and there isn’t much offense coming from this club’s middle infield. Basically, this is a throwback club and I believe that is a big reason why they are getting so much attention right now. It seems with all this steroid stuff dominating the news, pundits are looking to champion a team that is symbolic of a time when baseball was a little more pure. The Twins fit that bill and that is one possible reason for all these foolish World Series predictions. I am going with this thesis, but perhaps I am over analyzing the situation. Maybe it is something simpler like the guys at ESPN are just joking around with predictions that don’t count for a whole lot.
So we have our first confirmed steroid loser and his name is Alex Sanchez. Alex who? This is baseball’s wet dream – suspend a player nodofy has heard of and even fewer people care about. Sanchez is a non-descript centerfielder playing for a non-descript team and no one, including his mother, will give a second thought to his absence. That is just how baseball wants it. The steroid wolves, like this author, were seeking some lambs and baseball obliged with Sanchez – a guy who I thought was traded back to Cuba for the rights to the post-Castro Copa. This disclosure is so damn convenient that I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that MLB framed this patsy. Think about it. Baseball has to cough up some offenders. No one is going to believe the game is completely clean so what does baseball do? They find Mr. Irrelevant, juice up his sample, and single him out as an offender four weeks after tests were originally supposed to be disclosed. Is this a coincidence? Probably, but I wouldn’t put it past either the league or the union, Heck, the union doesn’t give two shits about throwing one of its rank and file under the bus so long as the guys with the big payrolls don’t get in trouble. And as far as MLB goes, they cannot have any qualms about manufacturing evidence so long as it helps them avoid another debacle on Capitol Hill. So that brings me to my second question. Is this it? Is this the only player caught in the spring training testing net? Commish Bud Selig had promised in late February that culprits would be identified as soon as possible, but we had not heard a whole lot until this recent disclosure. So is Sanchez the only problem child? Judging from Baseball’s silence all spring, long after initial testing was completed and results obtained, I wouldn’t be surprised to see Sanchez coming out of this as the only fall guy. Hell, if Oswald acted alone, who is to say Sanchez didn’t as well.
The Patriots are seemingly playing with fire as they try to lock up Tom Brady to a long term extension. Word out of Boston this weekend is Brady, a free agent after the 2007 season, is agreeable to a six year extension that includes a paltry $24 million signing bonus. This is way below market, as Peyton Manning and Mike Vick both got bonuses with three handles, but Brady has reportedly agreed to take a sizable hometown discount. How sizable? Well, Brady is basically willing to accept Chad Pennington and Matt Hasselback money. That isn’t a hometown discount – it is more like a going out of business discount. So how are the Pats responding to Brady’s generous offer? Well, they are reportedly trying to string out the bonus payments over a few years. (Guys, signing bonuses are supposed to be paid out up front – otherwise it is called salary) Talk about ungrateful. What is next – pulling stroke victim Teddy Brushci’s health insurance? Tom Brady is quite simply the BEST quarterback in football and he just cut the Pats a huge break that will provide them with some payroll flexibility. Owner Bob Kraft needs to sober up and stop trying to draw another ounce of blood from the heart and soul of his team. It is time for Kraft to go down to his bank and get a cashiers check made out to Tom Brady for $24,000,000. He then needs to drive by Tom’s house, personally hand over the check, and say thanks to number 12 for letting him off without a Vick-like ass raping.
There is a new face emerging in American women’s swimming and it belongs to fifteen year old Katie Hoff. The teenager from North Baltimore burst upon the scene last year by qualifying for the U.S. Olympic team even though she disappointed under the spotlight in Athens. This year, she is proving she was no Olympic year fluke, as she broke Amanda Beard’s American Record in the 200 IM on Friday night at the U.S. World Championship Trials. She also won the 400 IM and 200 Freestyle at the trials this weekend and there is a chance she adds another title before the meet concludes on Wednesday night. Hoff, who swims for the same club in Baltimore that produced Michael Phelps, appears to have the same kind of versatility as her old teammate, and at this early stage in the Olympic quadrennial, she is the only American teenager who looks ready to compete on the World stage. Based on this weekend, it looks like Hoff could be on the verge of a coming out party at this summer’s World Championships in Montreal, much like Phelps did in 2001. Meanwhile, aside from Hoff, the U.S. team at World’s is not looking so strong. Athens star Amanda Beard pulled out of the Trials at the last moment and both Natalie Coughlin and Kaitlin Sandeno seem to be suffering from some post-Olympic malaise. Coughlin may be back in shape come July, but as it stands right now, Hoff may have to carry the flag when the U.S. team arrives in Montreal.
The University of Pittsburgh took a hit this morning with news that both Chris Taft and Carl Krauser will make themselves eligible in this June’s NBA draft. Taft's announcement was not a surprise since he is expected to be a lottery pick, but Krauser’s move was a bit of a surprise since he is no lock to play in the NBA. Because of this uncertainty, Krauser is expected to keep his options open so if he falls too far, he would be free to come back. Nonetheless, the loss of Taft and senior Chevy Troutman, along with the possibility of losing Krauser, greatly clouds the future of this program. Jamie Dixon inherited a solid crew from Ben Howland after the 2003 season, but he has been unable to capitalize on his assets. In 2004, Pitt had a nice season before going down to Oklahoma State in the regional semis, but this year, Pitt regressed and suffered an opening round knockout in the tourney. Now Dixon goes into his third season as coach with a rather depleted cupboard. Dixon does have a couple big kids coming in, including 6’8 260 pound Tyrell Biggs, but Troutman and Taft will be hard to replace with kids. Listen, Taft wasn’t exactly Charles Smith, but he had his moments. He may have fellen asleep at times, but he was a lot better than your average Big East center. At this point, Dixon better hope Krauser doesn’t impress at the upcoming pre-draft camp or he will face the prospect of facing an expanded Big East in 2006 with a young and very untested team.
Let’s be honest here, Saturday night was not pretty for UNC, particularly in the first half. They were outhustled and outplayed by Michigan State and I felt they were lucky to be only down five at the twenty minute mark. It was North Carolina at is worst – Ray Felton was as wild as St. Louis Cardinal pitcher Rick Ankiel was during the 2000 NLCS, and the Heels were simply getting manhandled on the defensive glass. MSU was just throwing crap at the rim and successfully chasing it down with only token resistance. A few offensive rebounds are understandable, but when the number swelled to double digits, I was longing for the days of George Lynch. Fortunately, at halftime, Coach Roy Williams was able to regroup and the Heels came out and played a terrific second half. Felton stopped handing the ball over to MSU and the Spartans were treated to a massive helping of Sean May. I mentioned in my preview that I thought these two were the keys to the game, and in the second half, I was proven right. In the second half, Felton only had one turnover, made several key shots and got May the ball down deep where the 260 pound badass could cause havoc. MSU center Paul Davis gave a game effort, but he was no match for May who ended up with 18 second half points. Meanwhile, MSU, always a bit erratic when it comes to perimeter shooting, simply lacked enough firepower to stay with UNC in the second frame. The Spartan cause sure wasn’t helped by the fact that Alan Anderson went scoreless and senior Chris Hill was firing blanks. Shannon Brown took up some of this scoring load early, but when his gun cooled, the Spartans were cooked.
So now Carolina moves on to face Illinois in a matchup of the nation’s top two seeded teams. The Illini got a scare on Saturday night as they only led by one with ten minutes to go, but Luther Head rode to the rescue with three big bombs that slingshot Illinois to a lead that it would never relinquish. Head’s air assault followed a ten minute power sermon by Roger “The Minister” Powell that resulted in 14 unexpected points for Bruce Webber’s crew. However, despite Powell’s performance, Pitino’s Cardinals were right there with ten to go. And surprisingly, they were there without any contribution from Francisco Garcia. This could not have been anticipated, especially since Garcia was being defended by a much smaller player in Deron Williams. On paper, this should have been all Louisville, but Garcia looked unsure of himself all night and on many occasions, he forced shots that had no prayer of being answered. Yet, Coach Rick Pitino kept calling his number even though it eventually became clear that Louisville’s best matchup was Ellis Miles against anyone on the Illini’s roster. Miles was truly a force yesterday, yet Louisville didn’t do nearly enough to exploit his power. Further, I felt Louisville was much too passive on defense, rarely coming out of their zone and never pressing when Illinois had its entire backcourt triumvirate in the game. Perhaps Pitino felt his guys were just not quick enough to handle Illinois off the dribble, but at some point, he had to get some more pressure on the perimeter.
So why am I going with Carolina? It’s really pretty simple. Coach Williams has a weapon that Illinois simply cannot stop and that is Sean May. If Ellis Miles can unload on Illinois, just imagine what May will do come tip-off. If I am Coach Williams, I open up this giant can of whupass at 9:21 EST and shove it down Illinois’s throat for the next two hours. I am not saying the Carolina doughboy is going to have the same kind of 21/22 championship night that Bill Walton had in St. Louis back in 1973, but if I had to guess, I would say May is good for a 24 point and 14 rebound game on his way to the Final Four MVP. With May as their cornerstone, I think Carolina will have their way on offense so long as Felton can keep things tight. The Heels sometimes struggle with shot blockers, but that is of no concern against Illinois’s vertically challenged big guys. Further, Felton and McCants should have no trouble taking Dee Brown and Luther Head off the dribble. With that said, Carolina will get its points and the only question that remains is whether Illinois will get more. Hell, if the Illini pour in 15 three’s, all bets are off, but so long as Carolina can get some pressure out on the perimeter, I think they will be in decent shape. There are the key numbers I am looking at. Carolina needs May to rack up at least 20, Felton to keep his turnovers to four or less, and keep Illinois to less than 35 percent from three. So long as these metrics are hit, Carolina will leave St. Louis with its fourth national basketball championship in school history.
Ever since CBS got the rights to the NCAA tournament in 1982, Billy Packer has been the color commentator for the national championship game. Lest you forget, Packer came over to CBS from NBC where he used to work alongside Al McGuire in a three-man booth. I have always been a fan of Packer’s, even in those early days when he had to work with disgraces like McGuire and Brent. Unlike most in the business, Billy calls it like he sees it. He is an old-school analyst who is willing to offer an opinion even if it paints a player or coach in an unfavorable light. Moreover, Packer’s knowledge of history is deep and he has a great feel for identifying the subtle nuances that end up deciding games. Despite such qualities, I think I am in the minority as far as Packer goes. In recent weeks, I have heard many fans and pundits criticize Billy P and the cyberworld is filled with complaints aimed at the bald demon deacon. (http://underscorebleach.net/content/jotsheet/2005/03/billy_packer). If I had to synthesize these complaints into a single cohesive thesis, I would say basketball fans dislike Packer because he much too negative. I have heard other complaints as well, but the outstanding issue for most is Packer’s obsession with calling a glass half empty. What the hell is wrong with these people? Guys, Packer is an “analyst.” He is paid to analyze and offer critiques, even when such critiques are not flattering to a coach or a player or a program. In my estimation, there is nothing worse than an analyst who cannot step up and offer well-earned criticism. After all, every time someone takes a player off the dribble, a defender was taken off the dribble. In this case, both the success and the failure deserve attention. If you are going to bombard me all night with comments on how Sean May is unstoppable, than I think it is probably worth mentioning who May is abusing each time he touches the ball. And when coaches mess up, like Tubby Smith did against Michigan State, I want those mistakes highlighted and brought to the masses. Packer did as much when he faulted Smith for playing Timmy Lupus and Rudy Stein in the second overtime of last week’s regional final in Austin. But to hear his critics tell it, Packer was just harping on the negative to rip a coach he doesn’t like. We have enough glorification in sports and the reason for that is the networks, which pay astronomical rights fees, are unwilling to hire analysts who disparage the product. I wouldn’t say Packer unfairly disparages anything, but at least he is willing to offer an opinion that isn’t supplied to him by his producers. We need more of this in sports, not less of it. Good analysts must have a healthy degree of skepticism. Those who lack this trait should try out for cheerleader or perhaps writing equity research for a big Wall Street investment bank. I will be the first to admit Packer isn’t perfect, but I’ll take his frankness any day of the week over those whose purpose is to protect the product at all costs.
Could someone please explain to me what this love affair the guys at ESPN have with the Minnesota Twins? In case you didn’t notice, four of ESPN’s top six baseball writers (Jayson Stark, Buster Olney, Peter Gammons and Jerry Krasnick) have picked the Twins to win the 2005 World Series. It seems that every year, and in every sport, there is a trendy underdog pick and this year it is obviously the Twinkies. I realize it is a bit conservative and boring to pick the Yankees or the Red Sox or the Marlins, but what is this fascination with the Teflon Twins? What have these guys done to deserve such adulation? Hey, I will concede the Twins are a very well run organization that keeps plugging away with a great farm system and a $55-60 million dollar payroll. This is a club that is constantly able to reload from within and always acts dispassionately when tough organizational decisions have to be made. While such aptitude is to be commended, it doesn’t automatically make this club a serious contender for the World Championship. I recognize they have a stud at the head of their staff in Johan Santana, but do Brad Radke and Carlos Silva strike fear into opposing lineups? There are some great arms in the bullpen, which is shocking for a low budget club, but is Joe Nathan the guy you want out there closing games in October? He was passable against the Yanks last year in the ALDS, but those five walks in five innings don’t exactly inspire confidence. Everyone seems to love catcher Joe Mauer, but so what if he hits .300 with 25 bombs this year? Those are more Varitek-like than Pudge-like numbers. True, they will have super-soph Justin Morneau for the entire year this season, and he could be a monster, but he better be another Harmon Killibrew because there isn’t a whole lot of power coming from the corner outfielders. Getting rid of Koskie’s whiffs at third was probably a positive, but Mike Cuddyer isn’t exactly Gary Gaetti and there isn’t much offense coming from this club’s middle infield. Basically, this is a throwback club and I believe that is a big reason why they are getting so much attention right now. It seems with all this steroid stuff dominating the news, pundits are looking to champion a team that is symbolic of a time when baseball was a little more pure. The Twins fit that bill and that is one possible reason for all these foolish World Series predictions. I am going with this thesis, but perhaps I am over analyzing the situation. Maybe it is something simpler like the guys at ESPN are just joking around with predictions that don’t count for a whole lot.
So we have our first confirmed steroid loser and his name is Alex Sanchez. Alex who? This is baseball’s wet dream – suspend a player nodofy has heard of and even fewer people care about. Sanchez is a non-descript centerfielder playing for a non-descript team and no one, including his mother, will give a second thought to his absence. That is just how baseball wants it. The steroid wolves, like this author, were seeking some lambs and baseball obliged with Sanchez – a guy who I thought was traded back to Cuba for the rights to the post-Castro Copa. This disclosure is so damn convenient that I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that MLB framed this patsy. Think about it. Baseball has to cough up some offenders. No one is going to believe the game is completely clean so what does baseball do? They find Mr. Irrelevant, juice up his sample, and single him out as an offender four weeks after tests were originally supposed to be disclosed. Is this a coincidence? Probably, but I wouldn’t put it past either the league or the union, Heck, the union doesn’t give two shits about throwing one of its rank and file under the bus so long as the guys with the big payrolls don’t get in trouble. And as far as MLB goes, they cannot have any qualms about manufacturing evidence so long as it helps them avoid another debacle on Capitol Hill. So that brings me to my second question. Is this it? Is this the only player caught in the spring training testing net? Commish Bud Selig had promised in late February that culprits would be identified as soon as possible, but we had not heard a whole lot until this recent disclosure. So is Sanchez the only problem child? Judging from Baseball’s silence all spring, long after initial testing was completed and results obtained, I wouldn’t be surprised to see Sanchez coming out of this as the only fall guy. Hell, if Oswald acted alone, who is to say Sanchez didn’t as well.
The Patriots are seemingly playing with fire as they try to lock up Tom Brady to a long term extension. Word out of Boston this weekend is Brady, a free agent after the 2007 season, is agreeable to a six year extension that includes a paltry $24 million signing bonus. This is way below market, as Peyton Manning and Mike Vick both got bonuses with three handles, but Brady has reportedly agreed to take a sizable hometown discount. How sizable? Well, Brady is basically willing to accept Chad Pennington and Matt Hasselback money. That isn’t a hometown discount – it is more like a going out of business discount. So how are the Pats responding to Brady’s generous offer? Well, they are reportedly trying to string out the bonus payments over a few years. (Guys, signing bonuses are supposed to be paid out up front – otherwise it is called salary) Talk about ungrateful. What is next – pulling stroke victim Teddy Brushci’s health insurance? Tom Brady is quite simply the BEST quarterback in football and he just cut the Pats a huge break that will provide them with some payroll flexibility. Owner Bob Kraft needs to sober up and stop trying to draw another ounce of blood from the heart and soul of his team. It is time for Kraft to go down to his bank and get a cashiers check made out to Tom Brady for $24,000,000. He then needs to drive by Tom’s house, personally hand over the check, and say thanks to number 12 for letting him off without a Vick-like ass raping.
There is a new face emerging in American women’s swimming and it belongs to fifteen year old Katie Hoff. The teenager from North Baltimore burst upon the scene last year by qualifying for the U.S. Olympic team even though she disappointed under the spotlight in Athens. This year, she is proving she was no Olympic year fluke, as she broke Amanda Beard’s American Record in the 200 IM on Friday night at the U.S. World Championship Trials. She also won the 400 IM and 200 Freestyle at the trials this weekend and there is a chance she adds another title before the meet concludes on Wednesday night. Hoff, who swims for the same club in Baltimore that produced Michael Phelps, appears to have the same kind of versatility as her old teammate, and at this early stage in the Olympic quadrennial, she is the only American teenager who looks ready to compete on the World stage. Based on this weekend, it looks like Hoff could be on the verge of a coming out party at this summer’s World Championships in Montreal, much like Phelps did in 2001. Meanwhile, aside from Hoff, the U.S. team at World’s is not looking so strong. Athens star Amanda Beard pulled out of the Trials at the last moment and both Natalie Coughlin and Kaitlin Sandeno seem to be suffering from some post-Olympic malaise. Coughlin may be back in shape come July, but as it stands right now, Hoff may have to carry the flag when the U.S. team arrives in Montreal.
The University of Pittsburgh took a hit this morning with news that both Chris Taft and Carl Krauser will make themselves eligible in this June’s NBA draft. Taft's announcement was not a surprise since he is expected to be a lottery pick, but Krauser’s move was a bit of a surprise since he is no lock to play in the NBA. Because of this uncertainty, Krauser is expected to keep his options open so if he falls too far, he would be free to come back. Nonetheless, the loss of Taft and senior Chevy Troutman, along with the possibility of losing Krauser, greatly clouds the future of this program. Jamie Dixon inherited a solid crew from Ben Howland after the 2003 season, but he has been unable to capitalize on his assets. In 2004, Pitt had a nice season before going down to Oklahoma State in the regional semis, but this year, Pitt regressed and suffered an opening round knockout in the tourney. Now Dixon goes into his third season as coach with a rather depleted cupboard. Dixon does have a couple big kids coming in, including 6’8 260 pound Tyrell Biggs, but Troutman and Taft will be hard to replace with kids. Listen, Taft wasn’t exactly Charles Smith, but he had his moments. He may have fellen asleep at times, but he was a lot better than your average Big East center. At this point, Dixon better hope Krauser doesn’t impress at the upcoming pre-draft camp or he will face the prospect of facing an expanded Big East in 2006 with a young and very untested team.
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